You Are Not to Blame: Understanding Mental Health and Guilt

When people begin therapy, whether online or in person here in Aarhu, many bring a quiet, painful question with them:

“Why can’t I just feel better?”

Often, beneath that question, there’s something heavier: guilt.

You may feel like you’ve failed for not being “strong enough,” or for not improving fast enough. But if you’ve had that thought, I want you to know: You are not to blame.

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Mental Health Challenges Are Not a Sign of Weakness

The idea that we should be able to “think positively” or “snap out of it” is deeply embedded in many cultures. But real emotional suffering doesn't follow such simple rules.

Anxiety, depression, lack of motivation... these are not moral failings. They're often the result of complex factors outside of our control: family history, past trauma, cultural pressure, even our biology. You didn’t choose these challenges. They happened to you, and you’ve been doing your best to cope.

Why Guilt Shows Up in Mental Health Struggles

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) teaches us that our thoughts impact our emotions and behavior. But when we begin noticing negative thought patterns, some people end up blaming themselves for having them or not being able to change them fast.

You might think:

• “I'm failing at therapy.”
• "I'm just broken"
• “I must not be trying hard enough.”
• “Others get better. Why not me?”

These beliefs are common. But they aren’t true. Improving isn’t linear. It’s not about doing everything perfectly. It’s about learning to show up with compassion for yourself and accepting help, especially when things feel hard.

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Taking Responsibility Isn’t the Same as Taking Blame

In therapy, we work toward taking responsibility for our thoughts and actions. Not to blame ourselves, but to empower change. This is an important distinction.

You’re not being asked to carry guilt. You’re being invited to develop tools: to name difficult thoughts, breathe through discomfort, and slowly build new ways of relating to your inner world.

Whether you join me online or in my Aarhus office, this is what therapy often looks like: a space to understand, to reframe, and to grow without shame.

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You Are Already Doing the Work

If you’ve been trying to break unhealthy patterns, get through the day, or just stay afloat, you're already engaging in emotional labor. That matters. That effort is real.

Healing doesn’t mean your thoughts disappear. It means you’re learning how to live alongside them, with gentleness and courage.

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Need Support?

If you’re looking for online therapy in Denmark or prefer in-person sessions in Aarhus, I offer a space where your story is met with warmth, curiosity, and care. Therapy is not about fixing you. It’s about walking with you while you grow.

Use this link to book a session or contact me to my email: contact@camilostherapy.dk

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